He is a grumpy old guy with a ledger keeping track of our every action, good and bad.

He is a sleepy old guy who has to be shaken awake when we need him.

He has an extremely short memory and we have to keep asking him for the same thing over and over.

He has no idea of how to solve problems so when we pray, we have to give him an action plan for our problems.

But he never forgets our faults so we have to keep apologizing over and over for the same thing.

Begging is necessary to convince him of our needs.

He has no idea how to run a world so bad things are happening everywhere.

He constantly invents tragedies, calamities and troubles and irritations just to see how we react.