Forgiveness is the essence of Christianity. Without it, there is no Christianity. How can such a thing be said?
In the New Testament we read, “Wherefore as by one man, sin entered into the world and so death passed upon all men for that all have sinned.”(Rom 5;12). This summarizes the moral condition of us all. No amount of good behavior can offset the fact that we all are sinners at heart and the legal outcome of this in God’s economy is our death. This is more than just physical death but also our spiritual death as our sin is a spiritual matter.
We all need to be forgiven. If we are to be saved, we must be forgiven by our God. It is our greatest blessing that Jesus while on the cross in his last hour, said, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23;34). While he spoke in the immediate instance of those who had crucified him, we all corporately are part of that crowd and in the same need of forgiveness.
This great fact is the basis for our forgiveness of others. Jesus said …”if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”(Matt 6;15) Here is a very serious warning to those who harbor unforgiveness in their hearts.
The question might be asked, “Must I forgive if the person offending me has not apologized?” One clue to the right answer here is found in the example of Stephen, an early martyr at the time of the apostles. Stephen had just finished a sermon to the religious leaders of his day and they, in great anger, seized him and stoned him to death. Stephen’s last words, are recorded in Acts 7;60, “And he kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord, lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep.”
Of course, Jesus Himself as recorded above, forgave his persecutors just before he expired on the cross.
Another question might be raised as to how many times must we forgive someone who repeatedly has offended us? Jesus answered this question as well when it was raised by the apostle Peter. “Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.”(Matt 18; 21-22).
The message here is very crucial not only to relationships amongst people but it is critical to our own spiritual health. If we are unforgiving, we will be harboring anger and resentment. This will show up in many areas of our lives and ultimately, result in our own rejection by our Savior. Keep short accounts. If someone has offended you, approach them privately and discuss it with them. If they will not receive you, then you must decide how you will handle the matter. You might not be able to have a relationship with that person in future.
But you must forgive, for your own spiritual health.